quiet surprises

Much to the annoyance of my mother, M and I aren’t married. We kind of skipped over that bit and got down to the business of being a family. I wasn't particularly opposed to the idea of marriage, in fact I really quite liked the idea, it's just that we never really got around to it and given that neither of us are particularly religious and civil law is really quite open about these kinds of things, it just didn't seem like it needed to be at the top of our priority lists. But a couple of nights ago we went someway to easing my mother’s angst.  On a picnic rug, watching the sunset over the Melbourne skyline Matthias asked me to marry him. A very nice bottle of Champagne and a ring took part in the merriment. Afterwards we celebrated at a fancy restaurant where they call you 'Madam' and 'Sir' and we woke my mother up to tell her the news (she was pleased).

There are still quite a few decisions to be made before we actually marry - deciding the when and the where being chief among them.  And by where I mean the continent and country, rather than backyard or vineyard. So far Austria and Australia are favourites but Boston is also a possibility although the idea of organising an event from the other side of the world with no one “on the ground” to be the go-to person kind of does my head in.

*Picture taken with my smartphone just after... aren't camera phones awesome!?!

Growing

For the kickass women of the world.

Those that are, and those that are growing up to be.

The daughters. The mothers. The sisters.

The fribblings – friends like siblings.

The wives, The girlfriends.

The aunts. The nieces.

The grand-somethings.

The young uns. The teens.

The women in your life.

Who love, lose, cry.

Laugh, heal, thrive.

Nurture. Create.

You.Are.Amazing.

As. You.are

Stronger than you know.

More beautiful than you think.

Worthier than you believe.

More loved than you can ever imagine.

Passionate above making a difference.

Fioery when protecting those you love.

Learning. Growing, Not alone.

Warm. Giving. Generous.

Quirky, Sexy, Funny. Smart.

Flawed. Whole. Scared. Brave.

And so, so, so. much.more

Be Strong. Be Confident. Be You.

~Copyright: Tia Sparkles Singh, 2011

There might be a bit more of that kind of stuff around here. Hope you don’t mind. Mothering a daughter has brought out the feisty woman-lover in me. And for the record, it’s not that I don’t love men. I do. I love them to bits actually. But girls, we have so much work to do in the learning and self-loving to make sure we etch out a space in this world to talk about how we want things to be. 

This is my beginning.

Beginnings

It's no secret that our house has been having a few sleeping problems. E has never been the greatest sleeper, even at the best of times she has always struggled just to let her little body relax into dreamland. Although in hindsight we did have a pretty good thing going when while we were living in Germany.  Once she actually got to sleep, she generally slept well, waking only occasionally for the odd top-up. No problem.  It all went to pieces when we moved to Australia.  I was jetlagged, she was jetlagged and in addition to that completely overwhelmed by the move. For a while we clung to each other like it was nobodies business, an overtired Mama nursing her little girl everytime she made a peep (and she made plenty).   It took a few weeks but we eventually got over the jetlag and Emilia settled into her new home.  Only problem was that the lasting legacy of the whole thing was a fairly fractured sleep routine.  Everytime Emilia woke up she needed me to nurse her back to dreamland.  Sometimes it was twice a night but more often it was 4 or 5.  Last weekend we hit crisis point. There were tears and a sudden realisation that I just physically couldn't keep doing it anymore. What was broken needed fixing.

And so last weekend I stood in a section of the bookshop I never thought I'd be in and spent a good half an hour reading all the baby-sleep bibles. Turns out there's a lot.  With a little bit of reluctance I bought one that sat somewhere between "let your child cry it out" and one that promised a "no-cry" solution.  Nice as a no-cry solution sounds, it just doesn't seem realistic. We started lastnight. Safe to say I didn't sleep much lastnight. Crossed fingers we round a corner tonight and by the end of this week we'll be one the road to recovery and mending our broken sleep. And then... and then I'm hoping that I'll be able to emerge out of the foggy shadow of tiredness that is lurking over me and enjoy the summer.

The picture above is my first selfie for a photo project that I'm doing as part of Urban Muser's "In the Picture" challenge - a selfie a week for 2012. Hopefully I'm up for the challenge.